To Ask or Not To Ask?

Asking someone out on a date can be a daunting task. Ask guys about it and most would say yes. So imagine what it would be like if it's done by a lady. 

Most reaction would be a resounding:

So here's what I did: I selected a number of men and women aging from 20 to 45 years old (single and married) and asked them a couple of questions and tallied the results.

*All of the participants are aware that their answers will be posted on this blog.

** This is an opinion survey and not a scientific study. (lol)

The questions are as follows:

1. Do you think it's okay for a girl to ask a guy out on a date?

2. If "Yes" or "No", why? If it depends, please elaborate.

The Result:


Surprisingly, most of the guys answered "Yes" and a few ladies agreed with them.

Why?

1. Some attributed it to today's accepted culture.

"I think we're pretty much liberated this day and age." ~ Eugene, 35
"The waiting game is over. A confident woman will not mind what will people will think." ~ Diana, 40

"Maybe before it's thought of as an immoral action but I don't think it's the same case now." ~ Seb, 26
"OMG. Look at Sleeping Beauty, she had to wait for a century for a guy! This is not the middle ages!" ~ Lisa, 29 (This made me laugh.)
"People are more liberated now compared before." ~ Jun, 33

"With society nowadays, I think it's completely fine." ~ Toph, 21
"Love is fair in love and the 21st century!" ~ Kath, 29

2. Some of them thinks that it's women empowerment.

"If a guy can ask a girl out, why can't a girl?" ~ Joshua, 25
"If you really like the guy, the worst he could do is say "No. It's all in the mindset." ~ Maq,

"I think it's a woman's perogative to ask a guy that she likes out on a date." ~ Edwin, 45
"As long as she's confident and she really likes the guy, I think that's fine. ~M, 24

"A woman should be entitled to her own actions and opinions without society belittling her." ~ Jason, 28 (wow!)
"How on earth are you going to know if the guy likes you or not? I think it's perfectly OK when a woman makes the initiative." ~ Trixie, 32

"If she likes the guy, I don't think there's nothing wrong with that." ~ Khurt, 27   
"A woman should be free to do what she wants. As long as the guy is not committed, there's nothing wrong with asking? ~ Mae, 33

However, some of the men and women didn't share the same sentiment. Majority of the girls said "No" and a few guys nodded with their answer.

Why not?

1. Some like to keep it traditional.

"Guys should make the first move. Guys are hunters and girls are to be hunted. I'm not saying girls are preys, though." ~ Princess, 24
"A lady should not do what a gentleman should do." ~ Paolo, 24

"I'm pretty old-fashioned so I stick with guys making the first move." Maritee,

"I prefer to do the asking." ~ Red, 25
"Because it's not a girl thing to do." ~ Marife, 36

"I like the conservative way of waiting for a guy to make the first move, that way I know he likes me." Jenny, 25

2. Some of the gals think it can be degrading to a woman's social reputation.

"It's unlady-like and she'll seem very desperate. Emphasis on very." ~ Gina, 32
"She might send the wrong signal, even if it's not her intention." ~ Christian, 28

"It's a very awkward thing for a girl to do." ~ Anne, 21
"She'll come out looking desperate." Cody, 22

"Because that guy might tell his friends that you made the first move and make you look like you're easy." A, 27
"With society nowadays, the guy might get the wrong idea. They might think it's something more when it's not." Mark, 20

"Because most guys will use it as an ego-booster aka PPSS, Poging-pogi Sa Sarili (Feeling Handsome). ~ Zhelle, 29

However, there are several participants who are in the middle. They believe you cannot give a definite answer unless the situation or the scenario has been given.

Like?

“If she’s known the guy for a while and knows that he won’t take it against her, then that should be fine. But if she barely knows him, she could come out a bit strong and would be awkward on the guy’s part.” Jason, 36

“Well it depends on the person really. If you’re a type of person who can handle rejection well, then go for it. But if not, weigh the pros and cons thoroughly before deciding.” Mel, 35

“Has the guy hinted that they like the girl? If yes, then I don’t see any reason why not. But if she has absolutely no idea then I guess it’s a bad idea.” Arnold, 29

“It depends, I mean if you're totally OK with being turned down then sure, just prepare the ice cream in case you get a "No." ~ Ellen, 33

"Think of it this way, if he accepts, it could be because he likes you or he'll brag it to his friends. Think it over first. " ~ Dino, 40

"Depends on how you ask him out, I guess." Sheila, 22

My take?

At the end of the day, it all boils down whether we want it or not. If you're comfortable with your decision, then stick with it. Other people's opinions are just inputs and your choice shouldn't be based on someone else's.  

It takes guts, let me tell you that. There had been a number of times that I've chickened out because of what people might say. I've had my fair share of 'no' and I know exactly how embarrassing it can be when you get shot down. *Shudder*
But rejection is a part of life. I have this belief that I'd rather say "Oh, well" than "What if". The world revolves moves whether we want to or not, time passes regardless.

And not all guys are heartless and will turn you down. When my invitation got accepted, I had the greatest time.

 :)

What about you? Is it a "Aye" or a "Nay"?
Feel free to comment below. (Please keep all comments clean. ♥)